Fandom

Lostpedia

Comments2

Vindication: Stan and Kyle vs. Damon and Carlton

Ad blocker interference detected!


Wikia is a free-to-use site that makes money from advertising. We have a modified experience for viewers using ad blockers

Wikia is not accessible if you’ve made further modifications. Remove the custom ad blocker rule(s) and the page will load as expected.

For the 40% of us who feel cheated by the ending, vindication is very likely on its way. How can "South Park" creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone possibly resist the urge to do a spoof of the "Lost" finale? Given their tendency to dissect pop culture and expose hypocrisy, I think they would do an amazing job. Did anyone see their "tribute" to the fourth Indiana Jones flick?

Here's how I see it going down: it's finale night and everyone in South Park is psyched to see their favorite show wrap up. Promos flash on their TV screens saying things like QUESTIONS! WILL! BE! ANSWERED! and everyone can barely contain their excitement. Then they watch the episode, and as it progresses the happy-triangle smiles of each person's faces don't budge; they keep insisting, "Surely they'll explain that outrigger chase!" and "Walt's thing will be explained any minute now!" and "This is going to be the greatest ending ever!" Then, they watch a bright flash of light enter the church and an eye closed. The credits flash. Cut to everyone in South Park still looking at the screen, smiling as if they're waiting for something to still happen. Quickly their smiles turn to confusion. Then confusion becomes outrage...

The kids decide to go to Damon and Carlton's house and confront them, insisting that if it was supposed to be a character-driven story all along, it shouldn't have been promoted for six years as a great mystery show that was planned out all along where all of our questions would be answered. Other people accompany them, and any time they try to make a valid point about a huge plot hole like Widmore's senseless character development in season 6 or how the Island being underwater in the flash-sideways was pointless, Damon and Carlton arrange for a bright white light to come and take them away. (Kenny, of course, falls victim to this.) Soon actors from other serial dramas like "Flash-Forward," "Invasion," and "Life on Mars" join in, angry because "Lost" has not only ruined it for them, but blown any chance of any other mystery drama ever succeeding. Damon and Carlton arrange for them to disappear, but when people ask where they went, they simply say that if they ignore it for a few years, their disappearance won't be remembered. They insist for the umpteenth time, "It's all about the CHARACTERS!!!"

Finally, Stan decides to take on Damon and Carlton on their own turf. He tells them that if they want to make it all about the characters and not about the mystery, fine. But then what was even the point of THAT? Why were Desmond, Penny, and Juliet in the church, but not Walt, Eko, Ana Lucia, or any of the freighter people? And where were the rest of the Flight 815 passengers -- did their lives and deaths just not matter? How is that all about the characters? And what was the point of Jack having a son? And why did Sayid end up with Shannon and not Nadia? And why was Aaron a baby? And why was the whole concept not even introduced until the sixth season?

Confronted with their faults, Damon and Carlton try to defend themselves but ending up breaking down and sobbing. They admit that they didn't know where anything was going, and say things like "Giant statue? Smoke monster? Magic numbers?! We never had any idea! We thought we'd be cancelled in season 3 when we started doing episodes about Jack's tatoos!! I mean for God's sake, the Adam and Eve skeletons were characters that weren't even introduced until the end of the show. We didn't even have names for them!!" When the kids ask why they didn't expose the lie a long time ago, Damon and Carlton reply that ABC threatened them: if they didn't keep making people think it was all going somewhere, ABC would unveil a horrible secret about J.J. Abrams which would derail every project he's ever been a part of. With nothing left to lose, they decide to reveal the secret. J.J. Abrams is actually --

Bright white flash of light fills the room. The End.

Also on Fandom

Random Wiki