Answering questions Season 6 style

A man wakes up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat. He can't go back to sleep and knows what he has to do. He puts on his dirtiest clothes, grabs a roller and a bucket of paint, runs outside, and paints his house red. He doesn't stop until the whole house is painted red. In the morning when he's done, he is relieved beyond words. The whole neighborhood wonders why his house changed color overnight, and why it was so important to the man that he paint it at that exact moment. It becomes the big mystery of the neighborhood for months. Then, one night, the man wakes up in a cold sweat once again. He knows what he has to do. He runs outside and paints the house purple. The end.

If that was the stupidest story you've ever read, it might be because the ending made no sense. It sure did further the story... after all, the house is purple now... but it didn't answer anything.

The moral: adding new information and questions to an existing mystery does not constitute an answer.

None of the many, many questions about the Numbers are answered because they also correspond to the candidates -- that's just another layer of mystery. Nothing relevant can be gleaned from the statue mystery just because we find out it was a giant alligator; we still don't know the point, or why it was even included in the story. All of the Temple's intrigue is not insatiated because there was a healing spring inside that for no reason turned brown and doesn't work now. Finding out there's an ankh inside the guitar case, and inside that ankh is a note, doesn't mean much if we don't know what the note says (although, admittedly, we can guess). Finding out the reason why Libby was in the hospital in a different timeline doesn't tell us why she was there in the real timeline. A quick callback to season 3: finding out the untruthful version of Ethan Rom's story from Juliet doesn't really count as an answer, since, you know, it wasn't true. And lastly, finding out that the Whispers correspond to dead people who can't leave is great, if it's the explanation of a different story with five different seasons worth of clues. As for this one, nope... just stupid.

So in keeping with this tradition, I've decided to (spoiler alert!) let you know the answers to some of the biggest remaining questions.

Who are the Adam and Eve skeletons? Answer: Two people we've never met. We're not really sure why. Look, they're holding rocks.

Who was shooting at the survivors in the outrigger? Answer: Some Others. They were just bored.

What is the significance of the volcano? Answer: There used to be a volcano on the Island. Something happened to it. We're not sure what. Maybe it was covered by the statue.

Who is the Man in Black? Answer: His name is Jeff. He's a jerk.

And here's the big one: What is the mission of the Others, and how did they come to believe in it so strongly that they would die for it? Answer: They were well-paid by Mittelos Bioscience. 401K, dental. Holiday parties. Sometimes Jeff comes. No one likes that.

Sorry to give that stuff away, guys, but it was too exciting to keep to myself.

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